The Missing Pillar: Why Social Health Deserves More Attention
We spend so much time trying to take better care of ourselves. We work on eating right, moving our bodies, getting enough sleep, and tending to our mental health but rarely do we talk about one of the most important parts of health: how we connect with other people.
We’re taught to think of relationships as emotional, maybe even optional. But connection is biological. Our nervous systems are wired to regulate through safe, supportive contact with others. A March 2025 Psychology Today article says:
“A team at Harvard studying the social behavior of mice found that the brain treats isolation and loneliness in much the same way it processes hunger or thirst.” “Social connection refers to not only being close to others but also feeling emotionally connected, cared for, and valued. Positive interactions with others reinforce the brain’s reward system. When we share a laugh with a friend or exchange a smile with a coworker, the brain releases “feel-good” chemicals. Serotonin brightens our mood, oxytocin fosters feelings of emotional closeness, and dopamine reinforces the idea that connecting with others feels good.”
These researchers are proving what many of us feel instinctively. People with strong social relationships live longer, recover from illness faster, and experience lower levels of stress. The Harvard Study of Adult Development, one of the longest studies on human happiness, found that healthy relationships are the single biggest predictor of both longevity and life satisfaction. Connection isn’t just nice to have; it’s preventive care. When that part of our health isn’t nourished, no amount of supplements, workouts, or mindfulness practices can fully fill the gap.
Author and researcher Kasley Killam puts language to this idea in her book The Art and Science of Connection. She describes connection as a public-health issue as vital as nutrition or exercise, something we can intentionally strengthen through everyday habits. Her work echoes what I see every day in my work. Social health is learnable, measurable, and absolutely essential to wellbeing.
This idea sits at the heart of my Show Up framework, a four-part model that helps people rebuild confidence, connection, and community through small, consistent acts of showing up. The second step, Show Up for Others, focuses on social health and what it means to practice connection as part of your overall wellbeing. It’s about treating relationships the way we treat any other area of health: something we can strengthen through habits and routines.
Social health isn’t about being more social. It is our ability to interact and form meaningful relationships with others and how comfortably we can adapt in social situations. I often describe social health as a kind of workout routine for your relationships. Just like physical fitness, it’s built through repetition and rest and small efforts that compound over time. A few consistent habits make the biggest difference. Reaching out. Following up. Listening closely. Choosing depth over breadth. Allowing relationships to stretch and grow instead of staying on autopilot.
If physical health is about movement and nourishment, social health is about presence and participation. It’s the everyday practice of showing up in small ways that remind you that you belong, and that belonging is something you have the ability to strengthen.
That’s what we’ll be exploring this weekend in The Connection Cure: How to Strengthen Your Social Health and Happiness, a free workshop I’m teaching at the Women’s Healthcare & Resource Fair. We’ll look at how simple connection habits support your overall wellbeing and how to build your own “social fitness plan”.
The fair will be held at the Joseph T. Simpson Public Library in Mechanicsburg on Saturday, November 1, from 10 a.m. to 2 p.m. My session begins at 11:30 a.m., and everyone is welcome. You can find full event details here.
Healthy connection isn’t a bonus to living well. It’s the structure that holds us up. And it’s something we can practice one act of showing up at a time.
Let’s Keep Growing Together
Connection is a practice that extends beyond friendships. It shapes how we lead, work, and collaborate. Each small effort to show up with care and consistency builds social wealth that benefits every part of life.
If you’re curious about bringing this work to your team, organization, or community or want to stay informed about upcoming workshops, I’d love to stay connected.
